Exchange Words at Exchange Dublin, presents the fourth of our monthly comedy events. Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus 4 – All Your Sins, is an evening of blasphemous experimental comedy from some of Ireland’s most talented writers, comedians and storytellers.
This months guests include:
Kevin Gildea is a comedian, writer, actor described by the Guardian as ‘quirky’, ‘innovative,’ ‘creative’ and ‘pioneering’ and by The Sunday Times as ‘highly original and explosively funny’. He is familiar to TV viewers from his appearance in Father Ted and RTE’s ‘The View’. His bleakly hilarious comic fiction brings to mind Flann O’Brien, as performed by David Sedaris.
Narrative Arts Oh-Aissieux is one of the foremost figures in the Irish storytelling revival. As one half of Dublin’s Narrative Arts Club he’s been telling ancient stories in a modern idiom at Irish and international festivals since 2005.
Performance artist Philippe Senouci was the most exciting thing about the recent NCAD end of year show. His Beckettian nightmare piece ‘Performing Abjection’ was both hilarious and frightening. We look forward to his unpredictable contribution to the evening.
Film maker and ‘Milk & Cookies Stories’ star storyteller Thomas Rowley is the man behind the new Storymap Dublin project. His anecdotes of romantic misadventure are helping to popularise American style comedic storytelling in Dublin.
Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus is curated and hosted by Gareth Stack. Gareth is a writer and comedian who has performed standup comedy around Ireland, assistant edited Trinity College Dublin’s satirical magazine Piranha, and produced the popular ‘Invisible Tour Guide’ and ‘Technolotics’ podcast series.
The event will take place on Thursday 26th August @ Exchange Dublin, Temple Bar. Doors at 7PM, show at 7.30PM Tickets € 5 / € 3 concessions available on the door. This is a non-profit event, and all money raised goes toward the running of Exchange Dublin.
This is an open call for performers for Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus. If you haven’t performed before, that’s OK. All applications will be considered based on the quality and originality of the set you’re looking to do, we’re as happy to have writers and actors as traditional comedians.
First off, this is not a standup gig. Secondly, as a charity gig, we can’t pay a fee. What we do provide is an opportunity to do some genuinely experimental uncensored comedy, with a very appreciative audience, while raising money for a free open to all art centre (Exchange Dublin). The night is like a mix of Shane Langan’s Not Also But Only, Kalle Ryan’s Brown Bread Mixtape, and Cian Hallinan’s Voice Box.
We’ve run this monthly gig three times now, and here’s a few of the performances that have gone on…
* Kalle Ryan – Gave a lecture about how much of a legend he is, complete with slides.
* David Turpin – Read an epic poem about a Neanderthal falling in love with her kidnapper.
* Roger Gregg – Performed a musical detective story, with sax solos.
* Damon Blake – Read the mostly untrue diaries of his fear and loathing in Amsterdam.
* Shane Connelly – Told the true gangbang based story of Mary.
* Shane Langan – Read from his ever growing series of imaginary novels.
* Enda McNally – Sang his families theme tune karaoke style.
* Enda Muldoon – Symbolically killed his wife on stage.
We are looking forperformances that are NOT straight standup, sketch comedy, guitar comedy etc. This is a place to try a completely new direction. We have multiple microphones, DI boxes, a projector and laptop available to use during your set.
If you’ve got a humorous essay, weird video piece, comic play, interactive or audience participation bit you can’t do anywhere else, bring it to us. The atomosphere on the night is fantastic, the venues more like a theatre than a pub, and nobodies pissed so there are no hecklers.
With his rouged cheeks, soft alabaster skin, and sweet red ruby lips, there can be few who would fail to recognise his majesty Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus. For many his soft empathic features whisper reassurance, acceptance and a thinly veiled desire to dance.
You are cordially invited to the third Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus Live. An evening of dark comedy in aid of Exchange Dublin.
This months guests include:
One man radio theatre company Roger Gregg, whose astonishing performance blew the roof off a previous Exchange Words event.
Writer and musician David Turpin, whose wonderful album Haunted! was one of the best Irish releases last year. This is Mr Turpin’s first speaking engagement.
It’s our sadistic pleasure to invite you to our 2nd monthly event! If you love comedy, but are sick of the anaemic samey evenings of standup on offer in Dublin, then our evening is perfect for you.
Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus Live is a a monthly evening of dark and mysterious comedy from a variety of Ireland’s most talented writers, comedians and storytellers.
This months event features storytellers Shane Connelly & Tom Rowley (Milk & Cookies), and writers Colm Liddy (40 Fights Between Husbands & Wives) and Colm Keegan (Nighthawks), and more very special guests.
The event is presented and curated by writer and comedian Gareth Stack, who performs material featured in Piranha!, Ladyboy Jesus online magazine, and the upcoming darkly comic novel Jackdaw Fool.
Gareth has been described as across between across between Vincent Price and Stewie from family guy.
Expect darkness, hilarity and literary japes. There will be marshmallows.
This months poster is designed by the very talented Sarah Quigley.
Entrance is € 5 / € 3 concessions. Doors at 7PM, show at 7.30PM Facebook RSVP
Been ages since I wrote here. Broke both hands in a fisting fishing accident in January. So what with my weak wrists and the dodgy speech recognition on me iMac I have avoided confessionalising. Big news is me and Niamh made up! Her mam is still sending me poo’s in the mail, but since I moved back home we can face that problem as a family. Speaking of which, Andrew’s coming up on the big one one, time for the special talk about you know what. Sex. Can’t wait!
Tuesday 2PM
Had to take Andrew to casualty. The lady doctor said there should be no lasting damage from the shock, but not to mention cadbury’s caramels, republicanism, or hair nets around him for the forseeable.
Tuesday 11PM
Andrew’s bleeding from the arse, this doesn’t look good. I swear, the power of suggestion! Knew I should have bought that kryptonite for daddy’s secret cabinet.
Wednesday 3PM
Whenever I watch the weather I always imagine the forcasters hand as a big threatening giant hand looming in the sky. Imagine the size of the cuticles.
Wednesday 5PM
Finished me jigsaw of the Lindisfarne & Budle Bay estuary. Went for a walk, left leg is a bit stiff from a misunderstanding with the wife. Wish I’d realised ‘harder’ was a rubbish safe word. For a minute I thought someone was following me, so I found a doorway, lowered me cacks and waited for a nice surprise, but all I got was a chilly arse.
Thursday
Wouldn’t you know it, I forgot me own birthday. Trust Niamh, she had me back, and eight of the lads from the club judging by the sexy video she made me. Or maybe only seven lads. Pretty sure Arthur G. is a drag king, either that or he’s has the greasiest mickey in Dublin. Each to their own.
Friday
Andrew’s bum is healing well, which is good news, because Friday night means it’s time for daddy’s tasty vindaloo!
Hey folks. So this site has been dormant for far too long, but we haven’t been idle. Andrew’s been writing and getting up to all sorts of other mischief, while Gareth has been performing standup around Ireland, and running a series of spoken word events at Exchange Dublin. Now it’s time to take the next step, and bring some of the outrageously filthy and surreal satire and whimsy behind this site and out othercomedyprojects onto the live stage. We’ll be running an event named after the site at Exchange Dublin on 14th of May, 2010. If the events a success we plan to make it a regular home for alternative comedy in Dublin, featuring writers, comedians, storytellers and visual humorists from film makers, to animators and artists. Thanks for all your support in the past, we hope you’ll enjoy a night of something different in Dublin: Dark uncensored literary comedy, in an all ages, alcohol free space. You can hop on the Facebook event here. Here’s the bumf…
You are cordially invited to the first ever Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus night. An evening of dark and mysterious comedy from a variety of Ireland’s most talented writers, comedians and storytellers.
Our first event features comedian’s Shane Langan, and Ronan Grace; Milk and Cookie Stories star storyteller Tom Rowley; journalist and humourist Cian Hallinan; writer and publisher Andrew Booth; and animation from artist Sarah Devereux, as well as several surprise guests.
The event will be presented and curated by writer and comedian Gareth Stack, who’ll be performing material featured in Piranha!, Ladyboy Jesus online magazine, and the upcoming darkly comic novel Jackdaw Fool. Gareth has been described as across between across between Vincent Price and Stewie from family guy.
Expect darkness, hilarity and literary japes. This is not a standup comedy night. There may even be marshmallows.
Price is €5 / €3 concessions, with all profits donated to Exchange Dublin.
Our wonderful poster is designed by the very talented Sarah Quigley, and includes assets from radioPooh used with permission.
I finally did it… I bit the bullet and got up on stage. The first time was like my junior cert, leaving cert and début Butt Magazine shoot all in one. I sat at the back of the room folded into the foetal position, repeating my set over and over in my head, pausing only to drain an endless series of 7ups. When my name came- all too quick and earlier than I’d been warned, it was like being dragged to the chair at noon instead of midnight. The spotlight was blinding, like the full beam lamps of an oncoming moon driven by a mad moonman. I forget myself halfway through a sentence. I gibbered like an iguana given the power of speech. I got addicted.
So far I’ve managed to get five gigs down, not bad as it’s a fact that there are eight hundred Irish ‘comedians’ to every goon who’d feels like drinking at them. I’ve set up a blog to track my hideous journey. It’s here I shall write of my voyage from virgin to whore, recounting in nauseating detail each punters crude request. Check it out over at Virgin Standup.
Alias, Felicity, Star Trek… Fine mysteries all, exciting adventures, thrilling journeys with insolvable puzzles at their hearts, but what else do they have in common? All are products of the creative genius of one man: Enigmatic writer and producer Jolly Jim Abrams. Within the industry of making television and cinema films in Hollywood, Abrams (49) is renowned as the up and coming go to guy for that certain je ne sais quoi. With a head literally bursting with riddles, puzzles and devilment, and decorated with puppy soft, breeze tussled curls, Abrams will surely delight and frustrate us in equal measure for decades to come.
But did you know, Abrams is not just a creators of mysteries, but also an aficionado, a man who enjoys a good puzzle as much and perhaps more than you? For the first time JJ’s been kind enough to grant Marshmallow Ladyboy Jesus access to the eight mysteries that tingle his curiosity late into the cold unfeeling night.
Mystery 1 – The Magical Box
As a young boy, Abrams travelled with his father, also called Abrams, to the Lou Tannen Magic Store on Manhattan’s Lower West Side. There they purchased a magical box, filled with exciting tricks and embossed with the curious interrogative symbol that was to become Abrams emblem. Rather than open that box, JJ kept it, enjoying the limitless possibilities of what it might possess, the exquisite tension of his infinite ignorance, far more than any toy that could have lain within.
Mystery 2 – Mrs Abrams Maw
JJ is happily married with two talented children, the twin gymnasts Pierre and Princess Abrams, who so delighted us at Beijing last year. His wife, Akasuki Abrams is a success in her own right- her computer pet ‘Tamagotchi’ caused a Christmas sensation in the 1990′s, and it’s follow-up the dancing vacuum ‘Happy Vroom Vroom’, is expected to do equally well this holiday season.
A formidable woman, Mrs Abrams is likely attractive, but the world may never know. At their first romantic meeting on a packed Harajuku hypertrain, the future Mrs JJ happened to be wearing a ‘hygiene mask’- an accessory common in the germ phobic Japanese capital. Delighted by her enigmatic ambiguity JJ insisted Akasuki continue hiding her face as their relationship progressed, encouraging his future wife to don a succession of veils, chador and helmets. The happy couple were eventually married at a pitch dark ceremony in the Goa Jepang caves at Pyongyang. To this day Akasuki’s lower head remains an intriguing puzzle, as all photographic evidence of the girls chin and cheeks have been destroyed.
Mystery 3 – The Litter
JJ Abrams, like Genghis Khan and generations of Australian backpackers before him, has literally no idea how many children he may have sired. In addition to his acknowledged heirs, twins from his current marriage, and a large hairless child ‘Porridge Hyacinth Abrams’, borne of an ill advised liaison with Milli of 80′s popsters Milli Vanilli, Abrams is likely the father of thousands of anonymous children. Exact figure are unsurprisingly a mystery, but Abrams admits he enjoys knowing that every child he passes in the street could be his own. Interviewed at a red carpet premier in 2006, Abrams spoke of his ‘Bastard baking technique’, a hobby involving cat burgling poorly guarded sperm banks, to replace their juicy tubules with vials of his own powerful seminal fluid. Whose your daddy? In all likelihood, it’s JJ Abrams.
Mystery 4 – I’m hideous!
It’s difficult to believe, but we can confirm that this one is absolutely true. Not only has JJ Abrams, skilled TV creator, amateur magician, and professional intrigue weaver failed to behold his lady wife’s puss, the man has never beheld his own face. Strict Hasidic Mormons, Abrams parents raised him in a house without reflective surfaces. Although he has long since abandoned the religion of his birth in favour of the ancient Dionysian cult of hedonism, JJ has maintained this odd superstition.
Refusing to watch his interviews, and never leaving the house without his patented reflection blocking contact lens, JJ Abrams may be the first man in history with no idea of his own appearance- except for blinds.
Consternation erupted in 2005 when a militant group of anti-fans swathed JJ’s plush Hollywood villa in a series of enormous placards depicting his gurning mug. Disaster was avoided when Abrams flew in magician and NLP sex man Darren Brown, who cunningly implanted an hypnotic suggestion, forever protecting JJ from accidental exposure to his admittedly handsome face.
Mystery 5 – Chinese Proverb Say…
JJ Abrams doesn’t know which way the cookie crumbles, and he likes it that way.
Mystery 6 – It Was In, Surely!
The offside rule remains a confounding puzzle to soccer fan Abrams, though it has been explained to him many times.
Mystery 7 – ?
*
Mystery 8 – The End of Lost
A typically risqué scene
Research carried out by sweet rouged Marshmallow reporters has confirmed something fans had long suspected, despite claims to the contrary, JJ Abrams- the genius behind hit series Lost, has literally no idea how the programme will end. “The fucker makes it up as he goes along”, one colleague, then disgruntled, now former, told us, and this does sadly seem to be the case.
Records obtained by stealing from the offices of Abrams Production company ‘Interobang’, demonstrate conclusively that little thought has gone into the final season of the show- due out next year.
The notes, which range from slightly vague to utterly incoherent, are written in Abrams own hand, and consist primarily of brief sentence fragments, with curses and colourful epithets thrown in the margins. Fans of the show will be crestfallen to realise that the ‘Smoke monster’, a hoary puzzle which has remained unsolved since the pilot episode, will be explained as a “trick of the light, giant cigarette, radioactive Hurly guff”.
If you saw the lower half of this picture, you would literally vomit
Abrams’ notes are illustrated by crude, child like sketches of on-again off-again couple ‘Jack Shepard’, and ‘Kate Austin’, engaged in a variety of carnal activities, some of which appear physically impossible.
So called ‘Superfans’, members of the public who’ve devoted tens of thousands of pages to intricate theories explaining seemingly contradictory elements of the show, from time travel to messages from the dead, are likely to be infuriated by the ‘Big Reveal’, described succinctly with the line “Purgawhatsit?, Every one is robots?, It was all a dream!”
JJ Abrams, like Genghis Khan and generations of Australian backpackers before him, has literally no idea how many children he may have sired. In addition to his acknowledged heirs, twins from his current marriage, and a large hairless child ‘Porridge Hyacinth Abrams’, borne of an ill advised liaison with Milli of 80′s popsters Milli Vanilli, Abrams is likely the father of thousands of anonymous children. Exact figure are unsurprisingly a mystery, but Abrams admits he enjoys knowing that every child he passes in the street could be his own. Interviewed at a red carpet premier in 2006, Abrams spoke of his ‘Bastard baking technique’, a hobby involving cat burgling poorly guarded sperm banks, to replace their juicy tubules with vials of his own powerful seminal fluid. Whose your daddy? In all likelihood, it’s JJ Abrams.
